Apple Jack-ass
by The Shadowed Pegasister
Summary: Apple Jack beats the shit outta Trixie (surprisingly gets no charges) and wants to control her temper, luckily Sunset has a friend in Equestria who can help but her methods are very uh CRAZY! (AU/comedy/MLP EG/ violence)


"What the hell do you mean it's not accepted!?" Trixie exploded.

Apple Jack sighed, "I'm sorry Trixie, but I don't accept store bought apples."

Trixie scoffed, "Then why does your flyer say _**'Will accept any apples?'**_ "

Apple Jack gritted her teeth and clenched her fist _**I swear I'm about to beat the shit outta her. She can be a smart ass somewhere else if she's gonna make this into a full blown arguement.**_ "Ya need to read the small print it says ' _ **Any except but store bought'**_."

"You should have made it bigger then, duh. If your gonna make an apple contest at least do it right. You country folk aren't really bright, huh?"

Apple Jack stood from behind the apple stand, slamming her hands on the table, "What the fuck did you say?"

Trixie grinned slyly like a wolf and clicked her tongue, "I said" she looked straight into AJ's eyes, "You aren't really bright...huh?"

That was the last straw, too many people always said that country folk were stupid or half-minded, this time Trixie pushed her luck. Apple Jack jumped from behind the stand and ontop of Trixie, "So you think us country folk ain't bright, huh?"

"I uh..!"

"Well how 'bout a good old fashioned wrestlin match then?" AJ flipped Trixie on her back and threw a few good punches. Trixie tried fighting back but it was no use the country gal was tougher and stronger than she was, all she could do was cry for help. Big Mac came from behind the barn, and saw his sister beating Trixie to death; he panicked and yelled, "APPLE JACK STOP!!" It was obvious AJ showed no sign of stopping, so he groaned and ran to try and pry Apple Jack off of Trixie.

Big Mac heaved trying and struggling to get AJ off, "Sis..ya...gotta..stop...NOW!!"

Apple Jack looked at Big Mac for a split second and asked, "WHY SHOULD I!?"

"Cause yer gonna kill 'er!!"

AJ's eyes widened in fear, "K kill her?"

He took one last heave and got Apple Jack off of Trixie. Trixie could barely breath, coughing up blood. Her body ached and she had bruises every where. Big Mac quickly brought her inside and called an ambulance, leaving Apple Jack sitting there thinking about what she's done, "I I almost killed Trixie. I almost killed her." She started feeling a mix of emotions between sadness and rage. How could she? How could she be so blind? How could not feel remorse? How could her anger get the best of her?

A couple minutes later, the ambulance arrived taking Trixie to the hospital, one her way in the car she looked at Apple Jack and whispered, "I will end you, Apple Jack-ass" Then grinned mischeviously. AJ didn't know what to say, How the hell do you respond to a death wish?! She just went inside and cleaned herself up. A few hours went by and her friends came over. Pinkie Pie was the first to greet her, "Hey AJ!!" The girls bubbly bouncy tone made AJ smile a little. "What's wrong, cat got your tongue?'' The pink girl giggled at her own joke.

"Yeah seriously AJ, what's up? You called us because you said it was important." Rainbow implied impatiently.

Rarity elbowed Dash in the ribs, "Really Rainbow at least sound concerned!" The cyan girl grinned mischeaviously, Rarity just rolled her eyes in annoyance.

"Uh yeah come on in y'all." Apple jack had a lump in her throat so big she could barely breath. They all headed in the kitchen to talk. They were quiet for a moment but Sunset broke the awkward silence, "So did guys see the news? Someone beat the shit outta Trixie today."

Apple Jack's stomach tightened as soon as Sunset brought up the topic, "R really? I did'nt know."

Dash chimed in, "Yeah apparently it happened near your area AJ."

"Oh uh i geuss i didn't see anyone."

"The poor girl must be traumatized." Fluttershy said sympathetically.

Twilight cleared her throat, "Well Trixie is known for pissing off other people with her boastful personality, but this was a little too much."

Apple Jack couldn't stand sitting there, listening to their opinions on what _she_ did. She wanted to come clean but a part of her was holding it in. _**No i gotta tell 'em no matter what they might think, they are my friends, right?**_ "Uh girls I have a c-confession t-to make." Her stomach was uneasy but the cowgirl knew in her gut she could do this.

The group of girls gave her a concerned look. "Whatever is the matter, dear?" Rarity asked curiously.

"Ya see the thing about Trixie gettin' beat is uh.."

Rainbow was getting more and more antsy, "Just spit it out already!! Its not that fucking hard!!!"

"I'M THE ONE WHO BEAT HER ASS!!! THERE YA HAPPY CRASH!?" AJ sat back in here seat and pulled her hat over her face in shame.

"Oh Apple Jack." FlutterShy went over to her friend and hugged her tightly.

"Ah just- she.. _sigh_ I just didn't know what to do, she angered me so much I just started throwin' punches at 'er." AJ couldn't look herfriends in the eye, not now.

Sunset thought for a moment, "So your having anger issues?"

Apple Jack looked the orange girl in the eyes, "Y-yeah I geuss so."

"And you wanna make it up to Trixie?"

Apple Jack nodded her head as if answering _**'YES!'**_ "Do you know something sugarcube?"

"Yeah I have a friend in Equestria who can help, but she can be a bit of an asshole." Sunset sheepishly grinned.

"What's her name?"

"DarkWire"

The next day, Apple Jack waited for Sunset in the park. 10 minutes have passed by, _**Where the fuck is she?!**_ Sunset finally arrived.

"Where the hell were ya!?" AJ hollered.

"Sorry, something up with the portal",Sunset apologized, "but I got DarWire."

Apple Jack looked around, confused, "Where is she?"

"I'm behind the tree Sherlock." A voice from behind the old oak tree replied.

"Stop being a bitch and get out here." Sunset snapped.

"Well fuck you too sunny." A girl came from behind the tree walked out. She had dark grey skin, violet eyes, a hair cut like SpitFires but dark grey with light streaks, black Bluetooth headphones, a black hoodie, dark blue boot cut pants and maroon tennis shoes. She turned to Apple Jack, "So your the one who beat up Trix, huh? At least in this Dimesion." Her voice monotone-ish but a little more up beat than Pinke Pie's sister, Maud Pie, plus the grey girl's attitude had more, personality, to it.

AJ gulped and replied, "Um yep that's me."

The new girl's frown turned to a smile, "Sweet, i was getting bored in Equestria anyways. So when Sunbutt here called me up, I couldn't miss this." She turned back to Sunset, "And **_you_ **want me to fix this?"

Sunset's face turned red with anger, "Yes and if you don't, I'll leave you in the 'Molestia Dimension' again."

Dark's face turned from excitment to fear, "C-come on now, l-let's not be hasty here. We both know that'd be a mistake of the century and plus you're reformed.''

Sunset grinned smugly, "Or am I?"

Dark rolled her eyes in response then turned back to AJ, "Ok look come with me to the center of the park we'll start there."

Apple Jack's eyebrow raised, "Uh what?"

"Ugh do I really-? _**sigh**_ Just follow me ok?"

"OK?"

About 2 minutes later, they arrived at a huge fountain, it was made of marble and looked like its just been built even though it was made almost 200 years ago. Apple Jack walked around the fountain, "Whoo-ee nice lil dandy, ain't it?"

DarkWire shrugged, ''It's ok, I geuss. Hey AJ can you stand on the fountain, please?"

"Uh sure." Apple jack stood in the center of the huge monument, "why exactly am I- WHOA!!" Without alarm, Apple Jack was pushed into the water, coming back up, she was ok. Unfortunately, she had the bitter taste of bird pooo and feathers in her mouth. She looked up only to find DarkWire laughing her ass off. Apple Jacks face flushed with embarrasment and rage, "Why you little bitch, what was that for?!"

After Dark could catch her breath, her response was, "This is the first lesson dumbass, to control anger ya gotta take some things as a joke and not to heart."

"How the hell-? _**cough cough**_ " Once again the farmer was interuppted but this time by Dark splahing water into her mouth.

"Note how I said ' **some** ' Apple Jack, not all. And if you get mad, don't fight others unless they hit you, instead insult them and see if the results lead to fighting, a'ight?" Dark helped the cowgirl up "C'mon, let's get ya home, I'll drive and tomorrow we'll work on this lesson.''

5 weeks went by and Apple Jack was making progress,besides a few jokes pulled on her for Dark's own amusement. Today, Dark was telling AJ a few jokes before going to talk to Trixie, who got out of the hospital 2 weeks ago and is still waiting for an apology.

"Ok where do you find a prehistoric cow?" DarkWire asked eagerly.

"Hmm'' AJ thought "I don't know, where?"

"In a MOO-seum." Dark rolled on the ground laughing like a hyena being tickled to death. Apple Jack joined her with a laugh of her own. In the middle of that laugh, she snorted. The two girls stopped and lookes at each other, Dark tilted her head and asked, "Was that you?"

All AppleJack could choke out was, "Well I uh I mean-."

"Cause that was AWESOME!!!"

AJ perked up, "Ya think so?"

"Well duh, c'mon let's go talk to Trix." About 20 minutes later, they arrived at the Lulamoon residence, and knocked on the door. They expected her mom to open the door but instead it was Trixie herself.

Trixie glared at Apple Jack coldly,"Well well well, if it isn't Apple Jack." She said AJ's name like she had a distugsting taste in her mouth. She turnes to look at DarkWire,"And you are?"

DarkWire grinned and cleared her throat,"DarkWire is the name, being a tricksta is my game."

Trixie rolled her eyes,"Oh great another wannabe, if Discord wasn't enough."

''That's a lot coming from you." Apple Jack remarked coldly.

Trixie growled,"What do you want?"

AJ took a deep breath, "I came to say," she mumbled,"I'm sorry."

Trix grinned, "What was that, Trixie can't hear you!"

"I SAID SORRY, OK THERE YA HAPPY!?"

"Very and out if Trixie's good judgment you are forgiven"

"Well that's a relief-."

"On 1 condition" Trixie continued,"give me a years worth of cider, tomorrow."

"WHAT!!" She turned to Dark, who was enjoying what was going on and asked, "Is this aloud!?"

Dark shrugged,"Yeah I geuss."

AJ sighed, "Fine come by tomorrow."

Trixie smirked and sweetly replied, "Thank you" then slammmed tje door shut.

DarkWire patted AJ's back, "There there, I know a place where we can get more cider without using yours."

Apple Jack's eyes brightened, "Really?"

"Yeah but you need a black suit, stealth, and need to come with me through the portal."

"Why do I get the feeling this'll end badly?"

"Just c'mon already."

"Alright, whatever you say boss."


End file.
